Conflicts are inevitable in life, and resolving conflicts is essential to human development since it helps us learn, helps us grow, and sometimes helps us develop stronger bonds with others. Yet, vigorous conflicts are also capable of causing pain and damaging relationships if mismanaged. In my community, namely my school, conflict resolution and healing are deemed vital parts of our education. Being a coordinator in the Respectful Relationship Program, which focuses on avoiding and resolving conflicts, I’ve gained a better insight into how the school promotes healing after a conflict.

During the program, I learned that there are several steps that can promote healing after intense disputes. Firstly, students who struggle to cope with conflict are encouraged to engage in conversation with another student, a close friend, a family member, a teacher, or a school psychologist. These people can be resources, and often possess different perspectives on the issue or have valuable input on how to resolve such confrontations. Secondly, after a period of "cool down," the two people involved in the conflict should seek to engage in a conversation, instead of avoiding contact, because conflicts will continue to haunt us until we deal with them openly. It is important for the individuals to discuss what happened in order to comprehend what went wrong, how they each felt, and what could benefit them in future circumstances. This, in turn, helps them gain new knowledge of others and helps them develop a better understanding of the dynamics of their relationships. (Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.) It is also crucial for individuals to sympathize with what is felt and said. By attempting to place themselves into others’ shoes, they can connect deeply to the needs and emotions of the other. They should also be willing to compromise, since resolving conflict is impossible unless both parties are able to take a step back. After all, the key is to learn how to resolve the conflict in a healthy way.

These steps are not only crucial in preventing and resolving conflicts but also promote healing in individuals and relationships. Only efforts to actively reconcile can improve your relationship with yourself and others. These precious lessons are the ways that my community promotes healing.