Empathy is so alien to me. 

Sometimes people have tears streaming down their face 
yet they’re happy. 
They can have a face with a smile 
yet they’re full of fear. 

It all feels . . .
Odd
I can’t understand any of them.

I had a friend who I heard was laughing over the phone 
after I made a joke, so I made more jokes. 
I found out later her brother had died 
and she was crying.

The ones who act nice
but actually want nothing to do with you.
They’re the worst.

I thought they liked me, 
but whenever I asked to meet up with them, 
they never wanted to go.

One time there was a guy who I thought was my friend.
He said that he just felt bad for me
and thought of me as a charity case. 

I think the worst part about that experience is 
that I didn’t even feel sad, 
I feel like somehow I knew he never was my friend 
but always chose to ignore it.