My locker is like all the rest at the end of a long row of lockers,
I see my entire grade as I walk to it every morning and passing period.
As I’m walking, I think about a lot of things.
What class do I have next?
Do I have any missing assignments?
How long until my friends get here?
When’s lunch?
Then I see her,

CRACK

Like a slow-motion car crash
As she turns the corner from the staircase.
Shivers run down my back —
The bad kind when you feel unsafe.
That’s exactly how I feel,
Unsafe,
Unwelcome,
Judged,
Alone,
I try to shake it off, I try to forget, I try to let it go, I try.

But the thing I see and re-imagine and relive is how unwelcome and Alone I really feel.
Seeing her face every day reminds me of the terrible things she says.
The way she acts as if she’s better than everyone else.
It’s like there is no escape.
It’s my seat belt I can’t get out of, the one thing that is supposed to keep Me safe —
That won’t let go
Won’t let me leave.
As she drowns out the world,
The world is drowning me.
The car that kills.