“I am water reflecting. What is real, what is true.”

These phrases come from the Deer Park Monastery song “Breathing In, Breathing Out,” which describes a life guided by Thich Nhat Hanh’s Buddhism. Thich Nhat Hanh’s Buddhism, officially known as the Mindfulness Trainings, puts an emphasis on living intentionally in the present moment and making an effort to be selfless and aware of your actions. Thich Nhat Hanh developed these mindfulness teachings in the early 60s, and after gaining some support, created monasteries at which his students could practice all over the world, one of them being Deer Park.

While the main purpose of Deer Park was to create a space for monastics devoted to carrying out Thich Nhat Hanh’s mindfulness teachings, it also serves individuals, like my parents, who want to bring the practice into their daily lives. My mother and father had drastically different religious upbringings. My father grew up Jewish and was bar mitzvahed, while my my mother was raised Methodist Christian and spent her childhood at Sunday school and Bible camp. After I was born, my mother decided that she did not want me to be baptized. I occasionally attended the local church’s Christmas service, but beyond that, Christianity was of little significance during my childhood. When it came time for me to go to Hebrew school, my father, much to the dismay of my grandparents, came to the conclusion that he did not want either of his children to be bar mitzvahed. While they both appreciated their experiences with religion, my parents wanted me to be able to choose my own faith, and instead raised me to follow a life influenced by mindfulness. My parents first visited Deer Park when I was a baby, and since then, Thich Nhat Hanh’s practices have been a significant part of our family.

At the center of Thich Nhat Hanh’s mindfulness trainings is an emphasis on living in the present moment. In life, dishonesty forces others to dwell on the untruthful things they have said in the past, so honesty is valued in the Buddhist community because it allows one to live in the present moment. Additionally, right speech, which is viewed as one of the steps to the end of suffering, dictates abstention from telling lies. From my Buddhist upbringing, I am aware of how a lack of honesty tends to pull me away from my reality. By the same token, the emphasis on the present moment has made me less concerned with the perception of others’ dishonesty. While honesty is valued in Buddhism, perception of dishonesty is not. Focusing on whether or not someone is truthful takes one away from appreciating and accepting the present moment.

Following a lifestyle dictated by Thich Nhat Hanh’s Buddhism influences me to be mindful in my speech and actions, while being less invested in the actions of others. There are still times in my life when I perceive someone to be dishonest, or I am not completely truthful to myself and others, but Buddhist teachings about honesty’s influence on the present moment have pushed me to value integrity, carried out from one moment to the next.