Last year I was assigned Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer for my summer reading. Having read the book as well, my mother was curious about my impressions of Chris McCandless. At that point, I was nearly done with the book and I still had not been able to decide what I thought of the young man who journeyed into the wilderness to escape his life in society. When I expressed this, she told me that she shared some of my ambivalence and that her reaction differed greatly from my father’s when the book was first published.

At the time, my parents would regularly have the other couple in their duplex over for dinner. Into the Wild was popular from the start and quickly made itself a conversation topic among the two couples’ dinners. My father and the other husband, both white and male, had strong admiration for McCandless. They marvelled at his ability to break free from the expectations of his parents and society, a quality they both saw and desired in themselves. My mother and the wife, both women of color, felt differently. They saw McCandless’s actions as selfish and unnecessary for the point he was trying to make. They did not disagree with McCandless’s beliefs; in fact, my mother fought hard to break from convention and the expectations of her parents. However, they disagreed with the impact his actions had on his loved ones.

In many ways, I agreed with my father’s impression. Attending a college preparatory school where the path to a degree does not feel like a choice but a given, the desire to live a more spontaneous, simple life comes at times, especially when the pressures to fit the mold of the perfect college applicant are at their highest.

However, there are certain points in Into the Wild where I realized McCandless’s actions weren’t as noble as they seemed. Ronald Franz, a Vietnam vet who lost his family while he was overseas, took McCandless in for part of his journey. In the book, we learn that Franz felt a strong connection to McCandless and wanted to adopt him as his grandson. However, McCandless pulled away from the relationship when he went on to continue his journey. Not surprisingly, Franz was filled with grief when he learned of McCandless’s death. In a similarly poignant chapter, we are connected with Carine McCandless, Chris McCandless’s sister. We are enlightened of the impact McCandless’s disappearance had on his family, who were riddled with grief and sorrow from their lack of closure with their son. In one particular scene, McCandless’s mother is brought to the place of her son’s death. While reading the description of her holding his remaining objects, I felt true grief for his mother and the family.

While the emotional consequences of McCandless’s actions were great, his family members were relatively well off and he had no one depending on him. McCandless was also white, male, and handsome. He did not hold the weight of his actions being representative of the behaviors of those who looked like him. In my community, we are encouraged at a very young age to find our adventurous spirit and act on it. We love to revere the actions of McCandless and others, but we often do not consider the consequences for those connected to them. It is a privilege to explore the unknown and break away from expectations. There is nothing wrong with celebrating our McCandlesses, but idealizing this mindset diminishes those who do not have the time or privilege to be wanderers. There are many who would want to explore and break away from societal expectations but cannot, given their circumstances. Let’s not forget those who maybe do not have great stories of adventure to tell, but who stayed back to support those who loved and depended on them.